Realizations

I have come to several conclusions about life. One. I am an adult. As shocking as that seems to some of you, it is true. I know, I know. You're all thinking "How in the hell did God let that happen?" Well, it did. Interestingly enough, I personally don't feel like I've changed all that much from this year to last year. I'm the same old Mandy that we've always known, just a year older. No big deal. Anyway, with my adult status, I have noticed how people still second guess my decisions that I make for my life. It's not like I'm still not a legal adult and I have to have parental/gardian approval for quite a lot of things. I can do what I want, generally speaking, and the only people who I really have to answer to are my self, the law and God. Personally, I think that I am a responsable, level headed, intelligent adult who is fully capable of making her own decisions and I don't need people to second guess me and make sure that I'm doing the right thing and that I've thought about all my options. I know what I need to do for me and I've thought about how that will effect myself, others, and my relationship with them. I don't need to be questioned; I need to be supported. Two: it is really difficult to leave a place that you've made your home and established yourself in. I have a home and a family here at Queens. We are supportive of each other, and keep one another in check. We have no problem of telling someone they're doing something stupid. And certainly there are people here who are more mature and wise than others, and there are some who are more innocent and niaeve. It's pretty awsome to have such a great community floor where everybody talks to one another and cares for one another and feels welcome in their rooms. I don't really want to leave it. I live here with all these other people, and my friend/family unit of sorts. It's rather dificult to know that you've got to leave all of this wonderfulness of love, care and support. I know, the thought from all of you guys is "but THIS is your home. WE'RE your family." And that is true, I am related to you by either blood or marriage, and I do have a room and food and I am welcome, but family is a support system. It's a network, a connection, between a group of people who love and care for one another, and will call some of its members out when they're being stupid, unwise, assholes. If there's anything I've learned from all of you, it's that. You don't really need to have any sort of blood or legal connection for that, just some sort of connection. Here at Queens with my group, ours is that we were all stuck together in Albright and we're freshman and new to this whole thing. This is something that I don't want to leave.

Snow

It is currently 1:42 am, and here in Charlotte it is snowing. That's right guys, snow. No, seriously, I'm talking about the flaky white stuff that falls from the sky when it's cold. You know, frozen yet soft precipitation? It's sticking to the ground...well, the grass, trees, cars, cement benches and walls, roofs, gravel.....so far everything but the roads. As you all can guess, I am really hoping that it does stick to the roads. Why, you may ask. Because, sillies, that means that classes are canceled and we have yet another SNOW DAY!!! The days that all students from kindergarten to senior in college alike look forward to. And since I am in Charlotte, and they are much like Georgia here one single snow flake means that everything shuts down and people run out to the stores to buy up milk and bread.

On that note, why do people stock up on milk and bread when it snows? I mean, are milk sandwiches really going to save you in a blizzard? And did you know that before a hurricane makes landfall people stock up on plywood (as can be expected) and POP-TARTS! Why? I have no clue. I guess if they run out of plywood, they can finish boarding up their windows with pop-tarts.

Anyhow.....back to the fact that it's snowing here. It's so beautiful. I'm looking out my window right now and I can see these huge flakes falling and swirling in the cold air right before they hit the ground. It is one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen.

For future reference...I love snow. And I really love Charlotte.

Things You Realize

To me it seems that as soon as I left home everything, and I do mean EVERYTHING, kind of started to go down the toilet. I'm a little curious about that fact. Maybe it's because for some odd reason my crazy sense of humor and anti-seriousness and A.D.D. keep everything together, or maybe everything was falling down and I just didn't realize it because I was an insider. And we all know that an insider can't see what's going because they are caught up in playing their part. Hmm.....so either a.) my leaving was a result in taking the key stone out of this proverbial archway so it falls or b.) my leaving was well timed to get me out of this brewing and bubbling craziness, discord and chaos....you have just got to love those light bulb moments. In other news, the latest paper that I did for my CORE class got the grade of a B+ and we just finished watching the movie TOMBSTONE in my English class. Great quote from that movie is...."I've got two guns: one for each of you" said by Val Kilmer as Doc Holliday.